Sojourner's Truth

“Lo que pronto madura poca dura….what ripens fast doesn’t last…”

~A wise latina ~

A wise woman once told me that what is quick to ripen, usually doesn’t last.    She happened to be talking about cooking, but I was recently reminded of this a few months ago when I was talking to some friends about me dating again.  My intention for the last couple of years was to avoid seriously dating until August 2009, when I had my niece safely settled into school and my home was back in order (spiritually, emotionally, financially, etc.).

So yeah, I’ve made a few stops and starts, but I’ve always made it clear that I wasn’t in a place to do much of anything except enjoy the company that I keep with them in that moment.  There have been some pretty interesting personalities/situations that I’ve had the pleasure (and curse lol) of encountering.  Still, the southern girl in me prefers mating as opposed to dating.

I’m also kind of private when it comes to who/what/when/where or how I date.  Most times, I can be seeing a person for weeks/months before people even know that he exists.  I prefer it that way – especially if I really like them.  For me, the process of “cocooning” as I like to call it, is vital to me.  I love building an intimate lil’ haven, complete w/  its own unique rituals and quirks that we’re only privy to.

For some, that goes against every new millennium dating rule – where every potential suitor must be thoroughly vetted, discussed and approved/dismissed in the blink of an eye.  But for me, before I go public I need that sacred time – that private place to build a foundation, create a secluded world that he and I can always feel comfortable returning whenever we need to.   And if that process doesn’t work out and we happen to part ways, no harm no foul.

Building that space takes time, patience and privacy.  But if it’s done correctly (at least for me), when it’s time to emerge from the cocoon, I feel safe enough to allow my heart to enjoy the beauty of spreading its wings and taking flight.