[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7qCWCiu8230]
*RILEY: Oh yes, the victim! At what point does personal responsibility become a factor in this equation? I see piss comin’, I move. She saw piss comin’, she stayed…..
*inspired by the blogger who knows who she is
So as Riley says, let’s examine the is whole peeing thing. Nah, not the one that you’re thinking about. I’m talking about ‘marking your territory’…your relationship territory – especially when it’s fresh or you’re just in the dating phase.
I know that I’m not the first one to have a dude raise his leg and figuratively urinate on me to let others know that I was “his” and I won’t be the last. It all starts out innocently enough, you’ve settled into a pleasant, comfortable getting-to-know-you routine with a person or may even be in a full-blown relationship. Your man (or woman) sees you engaging – innocently or not – with another person and BLAM! you get sprayed with piss.
The gesture could be as subtle as 2 drops. Maybe casually walking over and placing a hand on an intimate part of your body, like the small of your back while keeping eye contact with the competition. Or the full stream in an embarrassing, “Harpo, who dis woman?” and o_O glare kind of way.
I’m not making a judgment on whether the art of “marking” is good or bad. Truth be told, there are some instances where, for me it’s completely appropriate.
A few years ago, Creasy (from the old blog) and I threw an NBA playoff party on the rooftop of sports bar together. We’d just reconnected and were at that stage where we’d emerged from our cocooning phase of dating and had started letting people know that we were an item. Since neither of us were “big announcement” types, it was just a process where people began to see and recognize.
At any rate, a one of the friends of one of our guests had a little too much to drink and was going overboard in his interest. Usually, I believe that in situations like that, I can handle myself. This time was different. Creasy is the type of guy that I love – the type that is always aware of what’s going on w/ you in a crowd without hovering. And because of that, he knew that my facial expression and body language was a bat signal. He appeared, pushed my hair behind my ears and pulled my earlobe. It was a gesture that told the other guy that I was “his” – without being aggressive or super affectionate.
In another scenario, a guy ticked me off to the point that I completely lost interest. He walked around with his leg raised at all times – calling me The Mrs. and all that extra stuff (Facebook stalking) while we were only on date #3. And as I mentioned in my cocooning post, I’m not really a fan of all of that early on. It reeks of putting on a show or stage play for the public and I am not an actress.
For the record, I don’t have any bladder issues. I can hold mine quite well. Like my general personality, everything’s pretty laid back in The House of Verdad. Yes, I am human. So sometimes I may see things that ’cause me to twinge w/ jealousy or internally ( o_O ) every now and then, but at the end of the day if everything’s good in my world, I should never have to brand an SV on a dude’s forehead.
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I am not a pisser. I’ve been pissed on more than one occasion–figuratively, not literally.
Now I’m wondering if I’m sexist or if society has conditioned me to believe that women shouldn’t piss. Because honestly, sometimes pissing falls into the role of protector for a man and I’m ok with that.
I’m trying to think of a situation where it would be appropriate to ‘mark’ a man and I’m coming up short. I need to think some more about this.
I piss. It’s necessary because ninjas WILL test your territory. Whether it’s a full-on spray or some sprinklets depends on the situation.
Women test other women’s territory too. But women often leave it to their man to rebuff advances. Whereas men often take it upon themselves to do the rebuffing on their woman’s behalf.
In my opinion, a woman should not be pissing with reckless abandon, but she’d better know how to and not be afraid to use it. Any man worth having is wanted by someone other than you. And there are chicks out there, just like dudes, who won’t take no for answer. At that point, mama needs to come down off the porch and let the stray dog know. There is a reason lionesses do the hunting in a pride.
#1: Lol @ “I piss”. Don’t the bruhs have that on a t-shirt?
#2: As for coming down off of the porch, the scene from Obsessed when Bey went to the office w/ her and Idris’ son came to mind. She checked ol’ girl and let her know that she peeped game.
That would totally be my style and I think that I’ve done that before, although I can’t recall when. It would have had to have been an extreme situation because I fully expect my man to appropriately handle rebuffing advances.
LOL… I think the bruh shirt actually reads “I piss oil.” lmao
Fornot made me laugh so hard. Of course you know that recently someone has been pissing full on on me. I think when I saw the initial sprinkles, I casually mentioned that i didn’t want guys I was dating or interested in writing things of a personal nature on my facebook. He asked me what I meant and I gave him examples. I told him it was fine to comment, but I didn’t want anyone to be able to read those comments and say “They are together!” That’s b.c we are not together. So even though I had this friendly chat with him he still does it. We also attend the same church and he arrived before me Sunday and stood outside and waited on me. You should have seen the smile wipe off my face. I’m a private and discreet person with my relationships and I’m just not ready for everyone at church to think we are a couple. We went to breakfast together afterwards and ran into 3 chicks from church.. I’m sure we were the talk of their breakfast. I’ve mentally decided no more going out for breakfast after. I told hm this and he seems to think I’m overreacting. But I need to do what makes me feel comfy.
I’m the same way. My FB pisser made me so uncomfortable (even after I told him), that when I created my SoJo page and he friended me – I put him on limited status. He can’t say a WORD. Not even look at my pics and I can’t even remember if he can see my status messages. I felt like I was in the movie The Craft, binding his powers. LOL!
I think that you and I are similar with the discretion thing. I mean, if I’m in a relationship with clearly defined titles and what not, it’s cool but in that dating phase I don’t want everybody watching our dialogue like a tennis match. The people that need to know who I talk to – know. But the random onlookers aren’t welcome.
I don’t think that you’re overreacting. But you have me CRACKING UP on FB. I want to pat that dude on the head SO bad and say, “Bless your heart. Stop talking!” LOL!
Everbody gets a dose of lasics aka vasopressin in this metaphore/parallel/simile. Shoot I was watching cloud’s story (a pbs special on wild horses). Horses do some low down fighting & all kinds of shyit over their mares. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vasopressin check the narative portion under the central nervous system (cns).
So wait, this hormone causes either aggression or bonding between males. You mean, the dudes aren’t just pissing because we’re sexxxy?????
OMG. Read it slower. The chemical is released during cecksie time. & when other males come around. It makes us pssssssssst on you. Like to say take her if you want her but I stuck my licked finger all up in the puddding already. You can get up on it but it’s mine. The agression is toward the man rain on his parade, sully his happy place, shyt on his couch, if you will.
A woman pissing on a man can cause more problems then she solves. I think lots of women like a man more if he has been tinkled on. Then the woman is more likely to think you are pissing because the man strays or she is so fly that you need to guard him.
I think men know how to respect the smell of piss.
I agree about men respecting the piss. It’s like in the male handbook or something.
Women on the other hand, I believe, are more cunning. The piss is like a challenge to some. That’s why I really think that the dude has to set the standard regarding advances and flirtation because if a woman with no morals sees an opening, she’s going in. And most times, the dude doesn’t even realize that he’s been set up for the okey doke since day 1.
“Or the full stream in an embarrassing, “Harpo, who dis woman?” and o_O glare kind of way.” – buahahahahahahaaaa! I don’t know why but that made me laugh so hard!