“As I look at what I’ve done…
The type of life that I’ve lived…
How many things I pray
The Father will forgive…”
~Lauryn Hill: Used To Love Him
It’s interesting to me, how many people seem to be ready to burn C-Breezy at the stake last night after his BET performance. While a lot of you thought that his tears were a fake ploy for sympathy, I was genuinely moved.
If anyone would be “against” a domestic abuser, it would be me, right? My dad was physically abusive…and y’all know my history with not.the.one.
As a woman who’s been choked to the point where she’s spit up blood for two days and called in to work because she couldn’t let her co-workers or students see the marks on her throat, I should be the main one giving Breezy the (<_<).
I've lived through the manipulation, the fake tears, the sob stories about a horrible childhood only to endure repeat offenses at the hands of a lover. But tonight, I gave Chris Brown the benefit of the doubt.
Don't get it twisted. I do believe that his choice of Man In the Mirror was contrived (he’s had a year to plan on it…and a better entertainment team than the stylist that dressed him in those God-awful bowties and sweaters). But I also believe that when he was facing that crowd of people who could either make or break him…again…and the words of that song hit him, he was overwhelmed and convicted.
Will he ever hit a woman or lash out in anger again? If he hasn’t gotten help? Maybe. Probably. But this may have also been his AH-HA moment. We’ve all had them.
Trust me, if you guys knew the magnitude of fukkery that I’ve done behind closed doors in my past, many of you may still be shunning me now. Lucky for me (and many of you), our AH-HA moments and our road to redemption isn’t fodder for the public eye.
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*Diva stands up to applaud SoJo*
HA!
“Trust me, if you guys knew the magnitude of fukkery that I’ve done behind closed doors in my past, many of you may still be shunning me now.”
And that’s the bottom line; same goes for most people, eme included. Folks are so quick to judge and condemn, but expect every break and chance in the world when it comes to everlooking their own misdeeds.
I didn’t see the Chris Brown thing last night, but my stance has always been his past does not doom him to an abusive future. he can change if he wants to and works at it. Besides, who am I to judge that dude on his past?
He broke down sobbing and couldn’t sing even the first line. The crowd had to sing it for him and then they threw in MJ’s voiceover til he composed himself.
My pet peeve is if you don’t want to support him based on that one incident, fine. But to annihilate a 19 year old so that he has no hope for making amends? It’s enough to drive a person crazy.
I choose not to support R.Kelly anymore because I believe that he’s a pedophile. He’s had what? Five, six public redemption moments now? And I’ve never seen people boo and ostracize him like this. Shout out to Hov and his God-like pimpslap of the blackball hand.
Even the Ar-ruh had another AH-HA moment, I would wish him well and hope that he was sincere.
Speaking of which, will u email me that clarification diagram? I KNOW you still have it.
LOL! Done!!
Damn, I hate when I read things late. LOL. You know, I was one of the Breezy haters – so I won’t come here frontin. I appreciated his performance (to be honest, I only believed that Mya, Usher, or Chris Brown could have pulled it off), but I was not moved by the tears. Possibly because the song choice was so obviously contrived. Has he changed? Who knows? Will he beat again? Who knows? But, my disgust was more with the ability that we as Americans have to be so forgiving of wrongdoings.
There are many men that abused once who are still not forgiven. But for some reason, we are hell bent on justifying a celebrity’s actions after we punish them for a year? To me, that’s irresponsible. I feel like it teaches our young children that they too will be able to get away with doing these things – and that is so far from the truth in “real life.”
I think that an even larger issue is that we glorify our celebrities in our minds to a point where they need to be “forgiven” by us. IMO, there is no celebrity or other public figure in my eyes that needs to redeem himself for me. The notion of people “forgiving” , “waiting to forgive” or “never forgiving” him has always made me (>_<).
The positive part of this situation happening between two well-liked celebrities is that it becomes a GREAT opportunity for a teachable moment for children. In my school, we had open dialogue not just about abusive males and the cycle of domestic violence, but also girls who like to put their hands on guys in anger (because Rhianna is/was also volitle).
On a unrelated but kinda related note, I've been noticing that more girls and guys brawl w/ no regard to gender. That's something that we (the next generation of elders) need to pay attention to. They are moving away from the "men should never hit women" general rule that we were raised with. That worries me, but its now out it the open due to all of the talk following Breezy's assault on Rhi. All of those conversational topics/youth building opportunities were able to take place due to this situation.
His record/concert sales, performance opportunities etc are irrelevant to me. Its our job as elders to teach the children that celebrities are mortal and use those moments to build their character.
I had a conversation w/ my best friend's little sister the other day about tearful manipulation and abusive men. I also shared w/ her my own volitle anger management issues that I had at 19, how destructive I was and the process (AH-HA moments) I had to overcome it.
Those are the things that we should be focusing on in our community. Not whether or not we forgive him. The only important people that matter in that aspect are those directly involved.
In other news, I REFUSE to forgive you for not updating ur site! How 'bout u hop on THAT road to redemption? *_*